This morning as I opened my journal to write down a few thoughts to start my day, a folded piece of paper slipped out from between the pages and fell to the floor. I leaned over to pick it up and smiled as I unfolded the sheet of paper to see my handwriting scrawled across the page in all the available free space front and back. I’m constantly writing notes on scraps of paper, and they’re tucked in strange places in my books, day planner and are scattered across my desk. I love those moments when you happen across a note that can transport you back to emotions and thoughts from the past.
I had written all over this piece of paper last February or March while I was in America. I had been quite moved when I read Michelle Fabio’s post My One-Word Theme for 2011: Now, and I was writing down the thoughts that her post had challenged me to think about. What was important for me to work on this year? After falling to my feet this morning by chance, now seems to be the perfect time to share what I had written earlier this year.
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I’ve been searching for my word for this year, sometimes actively thinking about it and mulling over different words – sitting with a certain word for a few days to see how it fits or being completely at a loss to find a word other days. But, as so often happens with me, it’s in the moments when my mind is occupied fully elsewhere that some of the most significant thoughts come to me. That’s when I heard a whispering as the word “reflect” settled into my mind and sat there quietly. The feeling was so calm and natural, and that’s when I realized I had found what I was looking for in my life. There was no more thinking, no more doubting or wondering if I had found my one-word theme for the year. It had arrived.
Reflect.
I could feel immediately that this was what I was missing. I’m really good at being busy. In fact, I don’t think I’m particularly good at not being busy. My idea of relaxing is cooking, sewing, knitting, or doing something creative with my hands. I relax through motion and activities that keep me present. That’s who I am, and I’ve come to accept that I’ll likely never be the sort of person to lay in the sun on the beach or do whatever it is that other people do when they relax. I love that about myself actually.
But I do know the danger is that it’s all too easy to get caught up in the busyness of life. There are always too many things to do and too many distractions that pull me away from the beauty of every day life. I love my daily life so much, and I don’t like the feeling of falling asleep thinking that it is all going by too quickly sometimes. I’m afraid of missing what I love because I’m not paying close enough attention.
The longer I’ve been in Italy, the more I’ve been able to understand that reflection is not simply about slowing down. Yes, I must practice good habits of making time to take leisurely walks and disconnect from work. But what I’ve been searching for this year is something more than just a change in my physical habits. It’s the mental act of being in the now, of being mindful of the present moment. N0t just making dinner, but being fully aware of the sound of the sauce bubbling on the stove, the scents that waft out when I lift the lid to give it a stir, the feel of the lettuce as the cool water runs over it in the sink and the pleasure that comes from creating a meal to enjoy with your loved ones.
I’ve realized that in many ways these thoughts are moving in the same direction as Michelle’s “now,” which is why her words struck such a deep chord when I read them in January. It’s making the choice to become mentally and physically present, and to reflect on how those moments fill our life. Every one of those present moments create our life and who we are.
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While it may be August, I am happy to be able to finally answer the question Michelle posed to her readers back in January. “Reflect” is the word that has stuck with me throughout this year and served as a nearly constant reminder to come back to the present moment. And that is preciscely where I want to be!
Is there word or theme that has changed your way of thinking in 2011?
Michelle | Bleeding Espresso says
I love this, Laura — and not only because I also happen to be someone who can’t lay on the beach haha 🙂 Interestingly enough, *your* post has come at a perfect time for me to revisit the “now” concept, reflect on what’s happened this year so far, and, most exciting of all, what I want the rest of the year to bring. Gotta love timing xx
Laura says
Dear Michelle, I thought of you when I wrote that part about the beach, because I remembered you writing once about not being crazy about the beach. Your comment means so much to me, and I’m so happy to have been able to return a little bit of the inspiration that you have provided to me through your beautiful writing. That kind of timing really is incredible! 🙂
Kelly says
This is a fabulous, and like Michelle said, timely post. Summer is always so busy, and sometimes I feel so “American” by getting nervous if I’m not busy producing something.
In fact this morning I decided to take the morning off and just read through some blogs that I enjoy but always skim through quickly to get the essence and then don’t take the time to comment and thank the writer for contributing to me.
Thanks so much for your reminder on the importance of reflection, as it adds the ability to be reminded that we are doing enough!
Laura says
Love this comment, Kelly! I think summer is the hardest time for me to find time to actually relax and enjoy each and every moment since it is so chaotic. You are absolutely right that it’s important to remember that we are doing enough each day. I’ll remember that! Thank you!
Lisa at Wanderlust Women says
Bravissima!
Laura says
Grazie bella!!
Welshcakes Limoncello says
A beautiful post, Laura.
Laura says
Thank you so much, Pat! 🙂
Sandra says
A most meaningful and thought provoking post, Laura. I so love you sharing your inner perspectives and the outward behaviors that they bring. How wonderful to express your moments of transformation and your growing awareness of the importance of staying in the ‘NOW’ to bring true joy and happiness to everyday life. Brava, Laura!!!
Laura says
Thank you, Mom!! You’ve been a huge part of all these new ways of thinking. I’m grateful every day to have you as a companion along this wonderful journey!
Barb says
Laura, My word for this year has been “enough,” in that what we have, whatever we have right now, is enough. I, too, have realized how essential to a life it is to be present. There is beauty around us if we have the eyes to see it and the spirit to take it in. Thank you for this reminder – I enjoyed starting my day reading your “reflections.”
The Empty Nest Mom
Laura says
Ciao Barb! Thank you so very much for sharing your comment and your blog with me. One of the things that I’ve loved about sharing new themes and posts like this one is how it has introduced me to new readers and new blogs to explore. Thank you! Knowing that “enough” is what we already have is so fundamental in life, and you put that so beautifully! It reminded me of a quote that I came across last week from The Happiness Project:
“Enough is abundance to the wise.” — Euripides
So very true! Thank you for really bringing that home to me with your lovely comment!
saretta says
My word would be “work.” As in I need to do lots for the money, but I have so much to do that it is overwhelming me. I do not get much time to reflect this way!
Laura says
Ciao Saretta! I feel most days like that’s my word for this year, too! 🙂 That’s part of the reason that I chose “reflect” as my word for this year, because I felt that I was getting too wrapped up in my work and missing the things that I enjoy so much each day. But I do have to admit that a big part of me is looking forward to the winter when life is a little less crazy! Good luck with all your work … and finding a bit of time each day to reflect! 🙂
Nell says
Longing is my word , you expressed yours so elaquantly,I will strive to express all that I long for in my journal, which of late has only been opened to write write in favoriate quotes.
Laura says
Ciao Nell! Thank you for stopping by and for sharing your word for the year. I hope you’ll have time to enjoy writing your thoughts about it over the coming months this year!